Fork In The Road (I think I'm hungry)

Have you ever been moseying along, feeling like you know the direction you’re going then bam, you come to a fork in the road and sit idle for a moment wondering which way to proceed? That’s me…only I have a dilemma. My fork has three “prongs” and I’m still sitting here. I’m not sure that I’ve ever come across a three-pronged fork on this journey…except when I’m being served dessert. You know, a delicious piece of key lime cheesecake would surely help me to move forward because sitting idle is getting me nowhere.

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Summer 2026 was HOT! The hottest one I can remember. It was the summer of sweat…in my pits and my nerves.

As the heat rose in Utah, setting record breaking temps, opportunities for my son and I rose as well. We were like blazing embers as we hopped from interviews, to speaking engagements, to book signings, to more interviews. Like protective fire gear, these moments help us step into the heat as we share our story, hoping to make a difference.

One of our hottest opportunities of the summer took place in Florida. In July, our family traveled to Coco Beach/Orlando. I know I know…who goes to Florida in July?  <girl raises hand high>

It wouldn’t have been my first choice, but I also didn’t think an entire Down syndrome conference would change the location or the month because of some Wendy chick in Utah. Plus, the heat was so hot here, I figured we were swapping out hot and dry for hot and wet. At least in Florida we’d have access to cool off in the ocean.

So, the initial reason for our trip to Florida was to attend a conference, but the multitasking side of me had this brilliant idea to reach out to our friend, who is a doctor, to get his thoughts on possibly doing some sort of collaboration since we were going to be in the area. My son and I have been spreading our message whenever and wherever we can so this idea was a win/win, plus it would also mean reconnecting with my childhood best friend who I hadn’t seen for eleven years.

“I love that idea!” was our friend’s response, so we put a plan in motion.

Normally, I like to have a few months to prepare for my speaking engagements; to write, practice, and memorize my speech. But we couldn’t seem to connect to nail down the topic and the audience. The clock was ticking. When we finally made the connection, we decided the topic would be on Community & Belonging, different from what I had spoken to in the past, but I love to challenge myself. This left me with just weeks to write a speech for a Keynote and for a Lunch and Learn…which we decided to add to the schedule. Did I say I love to challenge myself?

I’m an overthinker and I put a lot of pressure on myself for these events. I want to be engaging, leave my audience with an inspiring message AND make them laugh…or at least smile. My goal is to come across as I know what I’m doing, even when I don’t. Here’s a secret, I never wanted to be a public speaker! Seriously! I don’t like being up in front of people, I lose my train of thought (thank you menopause brain), and I worry that my nerves are as obvious as my large bosom.

Since publishing my book, I guess I feel called to speak because of comments I’ve received, and some pressure from those around me. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE to talk (which makes Wendy a fitting name for me) but I feel I do so much better one on one. I can talk until the cows come home…which could be a really long time since I don’t have any cows.

Anyway, my son has become a huge part of this path. It’s his story too so I’m starting to include him more when it feels appropriate. This topic felt like the perfect time to take his participation a step further. I approached my friend with an idea and he loved it! The surprise we had up our sleeves; we would end the evening with a speech from my son. Now the problem was, not only did I have two speeches to write for me, but I had to work with my son to write his speech as well.

So how does that look? Well, I interview him then format it into a document so it’s easy for him to read.

While we were walking the mall one day, I turned on my audio messages and recorded him answering the questions I had prepared. I got to the very last question, and his answer caught me by surprise. The tears wanted to flow, but I held my composure, after all, we were in the mall. I turned and smiled at him. My sweet son, beads of sweat running across his forehead and down the side of his cheeks, had just given me the simplest and yet profound answer.

“What’s it like to have Down syndrome?” I had asked. He shrugged his shoulders as he puckered up his mouth and said “It’s just who I am.” Best answer ever!

We continued our walk, him talking about his Deadpool shirt, me stuck on those five words. “It’s just who I am.”

For the next few days, we went heavy practicing our speeches. We did our best to memorize them, or at least try to get to know the people we were talking about, you know, ourselves. Have you ever talked about yourself? It’s harder than you would think. As I practiced, applause was non-existence from the audience I spoke to. They were super supportive and as much as I would love a little feedback from them, I’ve learned to accept their silence. To be honest, I think I would be a little freaked out if my kitchen table and refrigerator ever did speak up...but they are good listeners.

With the hardest part of the trip underway, it was time to pack. A ten-day trip with three people AND everything we would need for the events, really challenged my old mind AND my packing skills. I’m a list girl and the list for this trip was pretty long. In fact, it took two post it notes. Books, bookmarks, business cards, raffle prizes, contact sheets, pens, Matt’s stickers, thank you cards, swimsuits…oh, and clothes, both dress up and casual to accommodate the heat of our destination. Somehow, I did it. We were as ready as we were going to be.

After a four-hour plane ride, we received a warm welcome from great friends we hadn’t seen for far too long. We spent the first few days reconnecting. Playing games, enjoying a day trip on their boat, partaking of delicious food, and of course laughing a lot. My son and I practiced our speeches, and before we knew it, the night we had been preparing for finally arrived. The anticipation of this event had my stomach doing somersaults.

I had expected a larger audience based on all the communications my friend had sent out, but as with everything I have done up to now, I have learned to set my expectations low and look for the blessings in all things. The people our message was meant for were there.

The basis of my speech? To the society who thinks my son’s life has no value and that he is a burden, newsflash, each and every one of us will at some point be a burden to our loved ones. We are all one phone call, one diagnosis, one accident, one financial hit away from being the family navigating a life we didn't plan for. Just one moment away from needing the community around us.

I spilled my guts and my heart. Menopause brain interfered a time or two but thank heavens my crazy sense of humor stepped in and saved the day…or at least tried.

I finished and it was time for our surprise.

My son took the floor. He was loud and proud as he shared his story. He gave them all a taste of who Matt is. The sea of smiles in the crowd was proof that he owned the room. That and the fact that the questions in Q&A were directed at him. He nailed it!

I’m not alone when it comes to experiencing proud mom moments. For me, however, because of the surprise beginning to my journey into motherhood, those moments are often jaw dropping and unexpected. Some cause my heart to expand in my chest like a blow-up mattress. (Well, that explains things..ha ha)

As I reflect on that evening, the entire trip actually, the message I’d like to share is to never doubt your capabilities or those of the people around you. Don’t be afraid to step into the spotlight. We all have a story that could benefit others.

As it turns out, the three-pronged fork in my road is a pivot in my platform. The blessing in this experience was finding my “why.” Yes, Florida was hot! But get ready for it to get hotter because this girl has finally chosen which fork to take and I’m blazing forward. I'm feeling super flammable.

But first, a bite of some key lime cheesecake.

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